Posted by: janetleigh | November 1, 2007

Ode to Soul

light.jpg

Ode to Soul -1

that light is
the Light,
exists apart
from belief,
can be seen
without knowledge
it is there –

you say
it’s not fair –

you might not see
the Light
in others,
they might not see
yours –

both burn bright,
you don’t need to know the Light to see it.
*******

Ode to Soul -2

that light is
the Light
exists apart
from belief
can be seen
without knowledge
it is there

you say
it’s not fair

you might not see
the Light
in others
they might not see
yours

both burn bright
you don’t need to know the Light to see it
.

[Dear readers, if you have the time and inclination, do tell me which rendition pleases you more, in your comment. Thank you.]

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Responses

  1. This is a really good reminder of what we tend to easily forget. It flows and communicates.

  2. Just skimmed over a couple of your poems, and my first impression is that I love the way your words just bounce around. They flow like the Nile. I can’t always catch what you’re getting at (Hey! at least I’m honest) but the essence is real – straight from the heart. It stirs my writers blocked mind and reminds me to look within at what my own soul has to say.

    I’m no amateur poet…I’ve been writing for years. And I can appreciate a beautiful verse like a starving man would a pepperoni pizza…

    but for a few years now I’ve seemingly been at a loss 4 words (as I am right now) and I just have to get something out so that thoughts can be expressed, and feelings can be felt, even if they mean nothing and lead nowhere. So what do I have to say? The truth is, I’m up a little too late, I happened to stumble on your site, and simply had to leave a word of appreciation before I peaced out. Deep poetry dude! = ) I look forward to checking back at a more reasonable hour! For real though…your poetry stirs the soul. Keep writing!

    Tiger

  3. perhaps cut the 1st line. seems unneeded to this ear. enjoyed the terse nature of this art. simple and crisp. many thanks.

  4. a favor??? i saw you have a link to my blog. many thanks. can you change the name represented on the link to The Lint in my Pocket??? a small edit. i apologize if i am being a bother. hope all is happy and well.

  5. Thank you for your words, Anna. I’m a big fan of yours…:)

  6. It’s so nice of you to stop by my place, brokenheartedseoul. You’ve left me with enough kind words to give me a swollen head and a door too small to go through. I understand where you’re coming from regarding writer’s block. I’ve been there, too. I just tell myself, “this too shall pass” and write all my clever one-liners on slips of paper for a future look-see. Sometimes a poem can be created from the scraps. Give yourself some time to be inspired by other things until your mind wanders back to writing. I don’t think it’s good to force words if the heart’s not in it..:) Please leave me the link to your pages so I can come by and leave an encouraging word or two for you, as well. Again, thanks for taking the time to let me know what you feel about what you’ve seen here so far. I hope you will come back. I’ll be on the look-out for you, okay?! ;>

  7. I’ll take your suggestion about axing the first line into consideration, Scott, and thank you for any and all thoughts you have about my writing. I appreciate all feedback. And, yes, I’ll make the minor change in the link I’ve provided to your blog; although I copied it straight from Sara’s code she sent me. You might want to check to see if her link is to your liking.

    Out of curiosity, will you be adding the Comment feature to your blog?

  8. I love this poem. It evokes two things in me. First, I see the light represented in this poem as an aura. The other I see as the light after death. Both very strong images for me. I believe in both but, haven’t been able to experience either yet.

    Thank you for visiting my blog yesterday. Sorry I couldn’t make it by sooner I was busy. I want to thank you for all your kind words and for the links to my blogs.

    Have a nice day.
    Michelle

  9. I’m intrigued by the lines “you say it’s not fair -. I wonder who you are speaking to… and what they think is not fair… always a puzzle somewhere to ponder I suppose.

  10. i’d encourage you to revise – eliminate all punctuation…a poetic challenge of sorts. have and it if you wish…good luck.

  11. Michelle, I’m happy to know you like this poem..:)

  12. seeing without knowing…your metaphysics are defining well.

  13. Brian, thanks for stopping by and leaving comments. I love the fact that there’s so many minds out there going about interpreting words all in a row on a line.
    It’s a mystery to me how one poem can have numerous interpretations; some people “get” what the author is communicating and another may be left scratching its head. I certainly don’t always understand what I’ve read, but know intuitively that it means something to the author – else he/she wouldn’t bother to write it in the first place.
    I remember something from years ago: Write as though you’re addressing the reader. What does this mean to you? Perhaps I misunderstood the meaning of those words. It *was* years ago and I’m known to not *get it* about a lot of things.. heh heh, so no offense taken..

  14. S. Thomas Summers, I’m going to get right on it! Thanks for your keen eye…:)

  15. You seem to know what’s going on with this piece, Tom, so I’d be happy if you shared that with me sometime, my friend. Hope all is well with you.

  16. The second one is punchier I must admit. I prefer it. Strange how the simple omission of punctation can completely change a poem.

    I have to admit that I, too, prefer the punctuationless one, reluctantscribe. It’s more appealing to the eye and it seems to change the meaning of the poem depending on where one ends and starts a “complete thought”. I do believe in future usage of this poem, I will use the punctuationless one. And all thanks go to S. Thomas Summers for his suggestion.

  17. I have mentioned this poem at PWB. Thanks for being on our blogroll.

    Thank you so much, Sara! I’m enjoying your new feature, although it might take me a few days to visit each and every poet’s blog…:)

  18. beautiful janet. i find the first one more interesting in the way it breaks and falls.

    both leave me mystified and hint upon the many synonyms that long to be the soul of man.

    elegant in its simplicity it speaks to me of the rapture that lies between doubt and the last sigh.

    Hello, my dear friend {hug} and thanks so much for stopping by again! Even though I was persuaded to go with the first rendition, as stated above to Reluctantscribe, after reading the 2nd version tonight, I am going to have to agree with you, Shakir.. lol Why? you might be asking of this wishy-washy lassie. Because the lines have been screwed up by the Editor, I think. The lines do not break in the same fashion as the first version, and make little sense to me. -oo- I notice some things are changing on WordPress without the author’s hand in it. There might be some bugs in WordPress’ newest upgrade. I hope things are going better for you these days, Shakir. I hold you in my thoughts..:)

    Now, to fix the poem.

  19. Such strong phrases here — the last line has the ring of a motto. Nice work

    Thanks for your kind words, Nathan, I appreciate them very much; and Welcome to Poetmeister! Please make yourself at home; I hope you find something here that speaks to your heart and… come back for more! ;>

  20. You’ve asked for input on this … so here’s mine

    I favour the first Ode … but I would change the last line into:
    you don’t need to see the Light to know

    Hope this is helpful Janet … but keep in mind to go with what works for you … for it’ll carry your name for eternity :)

    Welcome to Poetmeister, Fenny, and thank you very much for your feedback. I appreciate your stopping in to check out my poem. I’m finding it interesting that a lot of people prefer the 1st Ode, the original. I’m trying to feel comfortable in the no-punctuation side of the poetry equation, and I have to admit that sometimes it works but for the most part I prefer punctuation. I’m also becoming crazy wishy-washy over this piece! Now, I find it heartening that you think the last line should read, “you don’t need to see the Light to know” because when I first wrote this I ended it with something almost identical but it changed the original intent of my piece and where I was going with this idea. I finally came to some peace about that last line, so I won’t be negotiating it any time soon. I hope this doesn’t dissuade you from coming back and giving me feedback on my work in the future…:)


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